My personal philosophy is to continuously enlarge my world. To me, this means I have a curious mind that is always in a state of wanderlust. I don’t think small. I think Global. A wide range of multigenerational women of all ages and a man, my grandfather, play an important role. I consider them gifts.
Why a gift? Because I am comfortable and excited in their presence. Though they are different, they all have common traits. I also recognize myself in them. With them, I am relaxed and at home. Especially now that I am a woman 50+.
To begin I will tell you how I began this journey. If you ask this small-town girl from Kankakee by the Sea, who taught her to live a large life? I can answer in two words — my grandfather. I found his actions awesome and appealing. They began to percolate within me at a very young age. I noticed he lived in a ‘sphere of magnitude’ and I liked that. Everything he did was grand. And if you knew him, you wondered how this man living in a small town, could live such a sweeping life.
In other words, I believe his goal was to take the grand tour through life. He had 5 sons, 4 wives, no education, and spoke with a broken tongue. This man built a thriving business, had 14 grandchildren, and was very charitable. He traveled the entire world, and believe it or not, he was a man of few words.
It was what he did, not what he said that I found very appealing by the time I was 10 years old. What does he have to do with women and friendship? His actions were expansive. He taught me to live outside the box, and this included my friendships with women.
WOMEN OF THE WORLD
It is my feeling that a woman is happiest when surrounded by women who are in sync with her. Women that mirror her. Seeking out compatible women doesn’t mean keeping yourself away from anything different. Quite the contrary! Because, in some manner, you recognize yourself in your new and old friends.
I admire women who age exquisitely. That woman plugs into her divinity. By that I mean she is a timeless soul inhabiting a body. She has an active ‘inner life’ that keeps her mind and body younger.
5 HABITS OF WELL-LIKED WOMEN
Well-liked women wear their confidence like a glove. They have a way of making other women feel attracted to them. How?
- These women are good listeners.
- They have a good concept about themselves.
- These women are calm, cool, and collected in challenging situations.
- They are worldly, able to voice their opinion on several topics.
- These women treat ‘everyone’ with respect, speaking to all in the same manner.
5 TRAITS OF WELL-LIKED WOMEN
- A GOOD LISTENER lets her friend finish before she replies. This is a sincere form of respect.
- A GOOD CONCEPT: She believes in herself. When she looks into the mirror every day she affirms this with kind words about herself
- CHALLENGING SITUATIONS: She takes a deep breath and thinks, ‘this too will be solved!’
- WORLDLINESS: This woman says to herself, “I am a leader when I speak up with confidence and let others know my opinion.”
- TREAT OTHERS WITH RESPECT: She greets everyone with a smile and shows sincere interest in others.
My friends and acquaintances have the above qualities and these qualities initially drew me to them.
They say when a woman meets a woman for the first time, she knows instantly if she will like her. I tend to agree. There is an aura about this new person that you find attractive. My advice for every woman over 50+, pursue her. You are in a new stage of life and newness can be very enticing and rewarding.
In the past few months, I have added two new women into my circle. One is my travel agent, Aysa and the other is my Pilates instructor, Susan.
A FRIEND I’VE NEVER MET
I have to admire my friends. It can be the way they pet their pooch or their 9 million educational degrees. They have to be interesting in some facet. These women must be genuine, caring, and empathetic. They cannot be selfish. These women have to live on the positive side of life and be grateful. Additionally, they can be rich or poor, any religion, from any walk of life if they have the qualities I admire.
Aysa is my travel agent. She lives in L.A. She has dedicated herself to becoming the best of the best in her industry. Aysa was born and raised in Turkey and she is married. She has seen the world, allowing me to see it with rose-colored glasses. We share girl talk!
She introduced me to the best walking boot by Marina Rinaldi. Also to the best series on Netflix, The Club ( it takes place in Istanbul). And, of course, we have a common interest — our mutual love of travel. Aysa ‘peeks my fancy.’ She is worldly. I love listening to her, learning from her, and sharing with her. We have never met in person. It does not matter. We are girlfriends!
A NEW ACQUAINTANCE I HOPE WILL BECOME A GIRLFRIEND
Then there is my pilates teacher, Susan. She owns her studio and an art gallery. My life has taken on a positive outlook since I began to work with Susan. Three times a week, I am at her studio at 8:00 am. I would not miss pilates or Susan. She, too, is a worldly woman.
Susan is a woman who will never age because she is aware of her inner soul. She will always be interesting to others and to herself. Put simply, I admire her. I look forward to sharing time with her. Ultimately, I want us to become girlfriends. We are on our way.
WOMEN NEED WOMEN
To sum it all up, women need women. I’ve said it before and I’ll continue saying it. The truth will not change. We would be lost without our friendships. In order to have friends and acquaintances ( very necessary) our qualities and our actions count — big time.
So look into your mirror and have a self-discovery date. If you have a trait that needs working on, work on it. If you are missing a trait, incorporate it. Lastly, be true to yourself. That will drive the right type of women into your circle.
What is the number one quality you look for in a friend? Please share your wisdom with me in the comments.